Alas poor John Thingy
He’s here nae mair
He’s clean disappeared
Like the last o’ his hair
Alas poor John Thingy
He’s been fund oot
They cried him a loser
An gied him the boot
Alas poor John Thingy
He was nae brain surgeon
He thocht Alex Salmond
Was yon Nicola Sturgeon
Alas poor John Thingy
I liked him just fine
I was fair scunnered when
They made him resign
Alas poor John Thingy
We’ll see him nae mair
They’ve called for Roseanna
A lesbian? That’s rerr